whose fault is this??

I am writing this as if it happened with us, as it makes easy for me to write.

During my graduation, my family is regularly visited by a person (not taking name) who was studying 10+2.  He was first introduced to my family by an accident. It was one of afternoons during hot summer, he asked for food as he was hungry. Mom thought he might be a beggar and since nothing is available with him to carry food, she gave the food in a plate which we generally keep it separate for beggars. After he blessed our family in sanskrit and left. Mom just surprised how come a beggar could speak such a good sanskrit and recite slokas.

Later we came to know the actual story. He is studying 10+2. His parents are teachers and from a brahinical community. He went on to say that his parents abuse him verbally by saying you are mentally ill and you need to grow up. He received same treatment form his school mates and colony people. So, whenever he was upset with his family he used to come to our home for food and spend some time chitchatting. During his chit chat we realized he has very good knowledge of bhagawadgita and few other hindu texts. we also wondered how much knowledge he posses at such age of 17.

unfortunately, he used face very ill treatment by fellow citizens of our town. Few times he used to come to our home with torn clothes and small bruises. We asked him several times to give the names of those persons who is abusing him so that it could be investigated by the police which he denied.

Suddenly, he stopped visiting our place. Upon inquiry we came to know that he committed suicide on railway track.

So, whose fault is this??
1. Parents
2. fellow citizens of the town
3. my family
4. GOD

Is it because parents were expecting more from their child even though their child is not capable of achieving what is required of him. There are somethings which cannot undone by the present medical knowledge.

Is it because fellow citizens were enjoying harassing the child.

Is it because my family helped him only with food but not with knowledge required to sustain his life.

Is it the fault of the GOD.

or Could we say nothing wrong happened here.

If I believe in GOD then I would definitely say it is the fault of the GOD who has given this kid a life but did not give enough knowledge to cope up the pressure in this world. But I could also say that he was taken by GOD as GOD felt that this kid suffered a lot and no need to stay in this world for long. Every person has a breaking point.

Parents too has breaking point. They never want to abuse their child. However, due to their limitations in knowledge & patience, their breaking point will be reached and Love takes the back seat.

Fellow citizens, the persons who was harassing the child are the rejected components of the human manufacturing plant owned by creator (if believed in GOD).

If I do not believe in GOD then no one could be blamed as it is nature that only the fittest will survive in this world. The term "morality" could only be attributed to the human beings if humans believe in GOD.

Reading or work behaviour

For long time I am not interested to work. When Ever I start any work my interest shifts to other work. This type of behaviour is persisting for three to four years. Because of this I am loosing my career. Still I am not changing. What is reason behind? this is looking like unsolvable question..

Religious books
I tried to take help of religious books, but as always when I start reading religious book, my interest shifts again. So, I started thinking deeply why interest is shifting. I started analyzing my thinking itself.

Analyzing my thinking
I am reading books or doing any work hurrily to finish it off as soon as possible. In this flow I am going on reading book till I feel tired or My opinions clash with authors opinion or my feelings are hearted with the facts in the book or facts are distrubing me.

Conclusions of behaviour
I can conclude following points on my reading behaviour

• I am taking the things personally
• anxiety very high in me
• I am tiring too early

Out of this I can say the reasons behind this behaviour

• I am greedy as I am not patient
• My physical strength is not enough

Solution

• Increase the stamina
• Eliminate connection to your feelings while reading or working but do it full concentration and interest

Trouble

I always felt difficulty in deciding whether I believe in GOD or not. Today for a moment, I felt I do not believe in GOD. because My brain is so much screwed with the fact that human is born. This always throws one big doubt in me. To whom GOD is born. If I go on thinking on this It will be endless thought. In this respect, Recently one incident took place in One of the villages of India.

one family consist of two employed parents, one daughter and son. Daughter studying first year of graduation, son studying in school. Son of a Local politician in that village, was very much interested on girls beauty. So, one day when her parents are out and her brother left for school, four men entered her home with a plan of raping her. In the mean time her brother came for lunch. she was threatened by them to do not disclose any thing and serve food to her brother. She did the same thing. After her brother left, she was raped by those four and hanged to death. After her funeral, parents left the village instead of filing a case against accused to save their another child as they were threatened.

For some people this incident is not a big thing. But think as if you are in the victim place. Even though she was in trouble, she helped her brother. This is called love. In my opinion that is what she thinks it is right and she likes to do. what she does not like is harassment by four men. This created one big ripple of thought in my mind.
Why shall I do things which troubles other. Why those people did the thing which she does not like... i.e suffering. No one is interested to do things which he does not like or suffer. When a person does not like suffer or do things which he does not like, He also does not have a right to suffer others or do things which other do not like.
From that moment I decided to avoid things which troubles other much. But it is not possible to completely eliminate the actions by us which troubles other. The only possibility is we can decrease the level of trouble. Every human being has certain capacity/patience to adjust to suffering/troubles/dislikes. So, I can at least try to avoid those actions which test human beings capacity to suffer. Of course there is no start or end to level of patience. It is personal judgment, how far can we stop ourselves from bad actions.
If one can think of another angle, What is the reason of this bad actions. I think answer lies in the words of Buddha.......Suffering......
It is the vicious circle. When a fellow suffers, he does bad actions, which suffers other. Again victim suffer others. It is like a virus. It is better to kill that virus, but it is not possible as it is inbuilt. but any one can stop it from spreading and very few can stop it from exposed from with in. The way to stop it lies in all the famous books .... religious, best sellers, psychology courses etc...
The answer is do not like any thing extremely(desire). If you did then do not try it be permanent. Because nothing is permanent. You enjoy as long as it is available. If possible retain it but do not take much tension. Then there will be not be any sufferings. Till now this is my perception of suffering and I am trying to implement it to be happy and have real enjoyment in life.
for the past two days I am feeling relaxed and surprisingly start enjoying in my work also. Previously i was much tense in performance, promotions, salary etc. Now it is entirely different case. I wish to conclude one thing. If you cannot love (not desire) the things you can at least stop dis-loving(desire).